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Advertisements. (All replies to the Editor please)

Fred's cafe in Teesdale. Open from 9.00 til 5.00. All food prepared on the
premises. Try our meals, and you will never eat anywhere else again.

Ramblers, when in Teesdale why not visit our churches. Get your souls
repaired, ready for that last journey.

Teesdale Colleges. Adult Education Courses.
If you are illiterate, write to us to enrol on one of our courses.

Year old Doberman for sale. Very friendly. Eats anything. Very fond of
children.

Pair of size 6 walking boots for sale. Suit lady. With well padded uppers.

The Twinning Arrangement.

Unfortunately, the twinning arrangement with the Rambling Club in the
French town of Grande Culottes has had to be abandoned due to a silly
piece of translation. Our Twinning Secretary, Mr Duncan Smith, who was
supposedly very friendly with the French, rather let us down. He failed to
answer several letters sent by his French counterpart, and when he did
finally answer them he made the excuse "Out of sight, out of mind".
The French obviously had no knowledge of idiomatic English and translated
it as "Blind lunatics", thought it was meant as an insult, and were furious.
The resulting letter from the French made two lady committee members feel rather poorly, and one fainted when told what had been suggested. The letter
was answered by Mr. Duncan Smith in barrack room language, he having been a soldier at one time.
The burning down of the British Consulate in Grande Culottes was excessive even by French standards. The Foreign Office has issued a warning to all
senior citizens, telling them to keep away from Grande Culottes because of
the dangers (Unspecified). English senior citizens have for many years
enjoyed Grande Culottes, and the thriving cartoonist community has long made it's living from Grande Culottes. It is hoped that this furore will soon die away so that the senior citizens can once again enjoy the style, the warmth, and the comforts of Grande Culottes.